The entire world is going through something unprecedented. Everyone has struggled differently for the past 18 months. Many people lost someone special or are afraid of losing the people they care about. It's difficult, to say the least.
The past year wasn't easy for me, I had a lot of personal problems, one of my cats died, I quit my job to start a freelance job, someone shattered my heart and of course the worldwide situation had a big impact on me.
In June 2020 I took the decision to start my self-love journey with small steps. I was always mean to myself. I always managed to find flaws and to question everything I do or say. My self-dialogue was far from being kind. I struggled so much with my body image. I was hating myself and it was time for me to change that.
Anyway, here's what I accomplished in my self-love journey so far and perhaps you can do these steps too, it's still work in process and some days I fall back few steps but then I remind myself why I'm doing this and go forward again. Trust the process and believe in yourself:
-No more negative self-dialogue. I actively stop myself from being harsh on me. breathe and remind yourself of your good qualities. Talk to yourself like you talk to someone that you love and care about.
-No longer doing things that I'm uncomfortable with, letting go of habits that don't serve me and staying away from people who spread toxins into my mind and spirit.
-Daily exercise. Even if it is a 5 minute stretch. It's very important for mental and physical health.
-Regular meditation. It's not like what we see in movies. It's a lot more simple and a lot easier. There're many apps and YouTube videos that you can follow to meditate and do affirmations.
-Learning something new every day. It can be as simple as a new word. This makes our brains happy.
-Doing something creative. Find an app to color or write a poem or draw a cat. Anything that exercises creativity in yourself.
-Express love. Exaggerate love. It doesn't have to be a romantic type of love. It could be the love for your favorite actor or your friends or even a plant. Talk passionately about what makes your soul shine. When you give love, it reflects back to you.
-Be aware of your blessings. When you're feeling drained or lost, pause and make a list of good things in your life.
-Love your body. It contains your beautiful soul. Don't have an image about what it's supposed to look like. Know that pictures that you see online are edited. You're not your height or weight. Focus on being healthy.
-You're not "getting old". Youth is how you think and how you perceive yourself. If you think about yourself as "old" then you become what you think. Youthfulness is a mindset that depends on your attitude towards life.
-Journaling your day positively and make sure to list things that you did or said that made you happy such as: taking your dog for a walk or watching a good movie or doing a new hairstyle or dancing.
-Self-care, it's essential. Take a bath, moisturize your skin, brush your hair. Do whatever you can. Simple things that you do for yourself give signals to your brain that you care.
-Don't hold on to people who don't want you. Love yourself enough to know your value and cherish who you are. When you love yourself you won't allow it to be with someone who doesn't know how lucky they are to be with you (that includes friends or lovers or anyone in your life).
-Set boundaries. Make sure to express your discomfort about any behavior that doesn't suit you. For example: work emails during weekends, don't reply to them, and find a professional way to tell your manager that your weekends are for you and your family.
-Express yourself loudly but kindly. Embrace who you are. Never be ashamed of your passions or your ideas.
-Know that there are people who will hate you just because you love yourself or because you're happy. Identify them. Recognize why they're doing this and don't give them any more time or energy.
-Acknowledge the fact that some people will try to bring you down. To stop you. To put obstacles in front of you. Make fun of you. Why? Because they know you're better than them, be sure of this and gracefully do a hair toss and walk away.
-Save your energy for love and empathy. Don't let people who withhold compassion and kindness control you. You're smarter than this.
-Don't be too harsh on yourself. Allow yourself to grow. Give it time.
-Don't compare yourself to others. Your journey is different.
-It's okay to be single. It's okay not to be married or not have kids. It's okay to pursue your dream career. Don't follow society's rules.
-Don't bother with what people think about you. You're not the misconceptions or misjudgments that you face from others. Don't let them control or defeat you.
-You're not defined by the material things that you own or don't own.
- Don't explain yourself to others.
-Self-love isn't selfish.
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